Honestly… Some people should not be allowed to use chat programs… At all

Holy shit! It’s been a while since I’ve actually updated it anything on my blog page. I don’t know, tonight… I just got a sudden urge of hate building inside me and decide to rant it out and what better place to let EVERYONE to read it not that… many people do read my blogs anyway.

What shits me tonight (or the last few many sleepless nights since I’ve start bloggin here) you may wonder; is well put it this way; you know those times when you’re on MSN, Yahoo or Facebook chat. You send a message to someone… you wait… and wait… and wait… and wait. Eventually, the other party replies and then you; being a good sport you are decide to reply straight away, and then you wait… you wait… you wait… again for their reply. I’m sure every one of us experienced that scenario once in our interweb chatting life time.

Then there are that other group of people. Who decides; making you wait for their reply is not enough but decide to absolutely shit you to the point of no return. How they do this you may ponder? Well picture this; You send them a message. Not just a message, you think being highly educated and all. You want to be efficient in terms of sending your data over the internet, so your message is in a way, a few sentences long. You would expect or at least thought that the other person would have common courtesy of replying with a message that contain more than 1 fucking word (I mean seriously, I’m not expecting too much am I). I mean, why would you do something like that? Don’t some of you have common courtesies? Is this something cool people do these days?

Then I realise no… I think they have their reasons, and I think the following is the reason why;

• They just want to completely demoralise you; they just want to break your social conversation spirit to the deep dark abyss of pain and suffering.

• Emos and pricks who wants you to experience their pain and suffering by letting you know that they are so sad, they just don’t want to reply with more then one word.

• Douche Bags… That’s right, some of you must be douche bags. Only a douche bag would read a long conversation and go; Hmmm… How can I, annoy the fuck out of this guy. Oh I know… I shall reply with the words; Alright…

Up to this point, whoever reading this will starting to get all defensive and might even be offended. I don’t care really. The fact that you got all defensive basically means you’ve committed one of those autracities I’ve just mentioned. Usually your explanation are one of the following;

• I was busy and didn’t realise you’ve replied: To the people that just said that as your reason of explanation I say; That is bullshit. If I can sit here do my engineering assignment at the same time, read the news, watch porn and reply to your message in less then a minute, THEN SO CAN YOU! I mean shit. You see how your MSN is blinking at you’re toolbar! It means something, I don’t know may be it means someone has sent a message to you. It’s blinking, because it’s an alert to indicate hey you have a message. You’re facebook chat; makes a *pop* sound, it pops because it wants your attention, and may be you should attend to it.

• But Ray, you have to understand, you’re not the only person I’m chatting to; Again… Bullshit. You’re right at the same time I’m also chatting/talking/abusing/being abused/discussing world domination with someone else and again; If I still replied your message in less then a minute then so can you!

• Oh Ray I was away from the computer; This is the part where common courtesy comes in. The acronym of ‘brb’ is used in this situation. If you don’t know what it stands for, I’m not even going to bother explaining what it stands for. You’re just a retard till date if you don’t know what it stands for.

I mean honestly people, its not hard. I’m not anything special, I don’t see why if I can do it, you can’t. It’s not hard really. I mean may be not everyone is not talented enough to be multitasking; they can’t watch Youtube and talk at the same time fair enough but shit you can’t even quickly just type the words ‘brb’ quickly? Does it really take that long to type those little 3 letters? I mean what could you possibly missed in that 2 seconds of typing a 3 letters word.

Answering more then one word is not hard as well. Unless you’re vocabulary is horrible and the only word you know is;

• Alright
• OK
• Sure

I mean seriously go back to school and get your self an education, so you can expand your vocabulary. I’ve seen cockatoos with more vocabulary then you people. Up till this point you might be saying; Oh Ray, then don’t talk this people, ignore them if they cause you so much hate and anger. The thing is… I don’t! I ignore them, though I keep them on my list constantly remind myself why I’m better certain people. I mean I personally know a person who starts a conversation with you. Yes! You read it correct. She starts a conversation with me, I thought I pretend to care; and ask hows things, give advices about life and then she renders in to… I’m fine, alright, sure, OK… I mean honestly fuck! You start the conversation with me and you make me feel like a douche! I mean honestly I rather you didn’t start the conversation in the first place and sit idly on my contact list under ‘People who a complete douche bags and not worth talking’

I confess at times I made the mistakes as well. But at least I have the decency to apologise to whoever I was talking to, feel embarrassed and ask for their forgiveness. But for some people, they’re just jerks. I often wonder is it me that their only doing it to, or do they do it to all their friends? How do their friends feel, then I figured if they do that to their friends, and they are friends that means there’s no problem, because they’ll just repeat the cycle to one another. Then it saddens me, means there is one more extra douche bag in society.

Or may be I just expect to much from people these days. I thank the Great Architect Of The Universe not everyone is like that and there ARE people who follow those rules I’ve mentioned earlier on, and in time two things will happen to those people who don’t, who are assholes when it comes to online conversation;

1. They will learn their lesson, realise what dick they are and what pain they have caused the world. Improve themselves in the future.
2. Die out like other worthless livings on this planet like their ancestors did 65 million years ago and in the end continue to expand the gene pool.

In the mean time though, if you’re one of those people. I honestly don’t want to talk to you; I will not say hi to you since I know what I’m getting into, you are welcome to say hi to me though. I will not be an ass to you, though as soon as you do, I’ll just hope you die, in a very painful way while everyone is watching.

 

Holy shit its been a while…

Wow, its been a while since I’ve been here, not that anyone cares, I mean this site is after all a place for me just to rant about the shit that really annoys me, kind of like a personal diary, except you… people… are able to read it. So anyway, its been more than two months since I last add an entry to this blog. I thought I should clarify certain things.

Firstly, yes, to those of you that heard the rumors, I am and have indeed joined the Freemasons. No I don’t care if they read this site and see me confessing being a Mason, nothing wrong with that. I mean hell, if a guy can have tattoos of Masonic symbols on his body why can’t I confess it online? No its not a secret society. Its more of a ‘society with secrets‘. Anyway to those who knew what Freemasons are I’m here to answer all your questions:

• No, its not a cult.
• No, its we’re not taking over the world.
• No, I will not tell you what the ‘Masonic secret’ is.
• Yes, we have a secret hand shake.
• No, I will not show you what the secret hand shake is.

There, I hope that clear things up for all of you. For those who don’t know what Freemason is. I’m not gonna explain it, just search it up on the net. I mean, it could be worse… I could’ve joined the Church of Scientology and paid a crap load of money for some science fiction bullshit.

 

Religion – so which one is right for you

I really should be studying right now, in fact I really should be at Deans house with the boys getting trashed and playing with his new modified Wii… that sounded really wrong. Anyway, instead of doing all those I decide to do this blog. I don’t usually don’t touch on a topic like this, its quite sensitive. Then again I’ve done several sensitive blogs. I mean who am I to say which religion is the right religion? Instead, I’m gonna blog about what’s wrong with the different religions. Again, I’m not here to start a crusade, jihad or a religious war, instead going through a religious journey to see which religion is right, I’ve decide to different look at the hypocrisy offered by religion.

Let’s start with the most popular religion right now… on the media anyway; Muslim (or Islam) or whatever they call themselves, claim to be a religion of peace… except if you don’t believe them… that’s when they’ll claim you’re an infidel, and kill you. I mean don’t get me wrong, not here to bash Muslims, some of those are great people. Except only these are the same people that got pissed off because of a comic strip (picture right) yet it is OK for them to destroy a Buddhist statue more than 2000 years old (despite international plead). Fair enough it is against their religion to put their prophet on a picture and at the same time it is against their religion to have another religion’s symbol in their land, but haven’t these people ever heard of religious tolerance? Guess not, else this blog won’t be here by now.

Then next we have Christians or Catholics, honestly why can’t some of these religions just stick to one name? for the hell of of this blog we’ll just refer them all as Christians. Now you may be wondering; Wait a minute… how are Christians hypocrites? They seem like the most peaceful people out of any religion, they haven’t hurt anybody at all… right? Well… no, I mean just during the early 1095 to 1291 something called The Crusades where under the name of God they try to take back the holy land of Jerusalem which at the time was controlled by the Muslims. Less than 200 years later a manual titled Malleus Maleficarum (bottom left) or the Witches Hammer was published. The manual taught Catholics on how to catch and torture specifically women who has been accused of Witchcraft, between 1487 to 1520 around 600,000 to 900,000 was killed because of being accused of Witchcraft. Now switching to modern day, there priest who are supposed to be represent God to the people who has has been caught for being lolicon. Don’t get me wrong though, not saying all Christian or Catholics are all warmongering-witch hunting-lolicons the fact is; it wasn’t their Gods fault, it was their believers, their ambassadors who created their dark history. May be they should choose their representative carefully next time.

Judaism is next on the agenda, but wait, what did the Jews ever did to the us? Well nothing really, just want to make a point about perhaps these are the most unlucky people in history… ever! I mean they did put Jesus on the cross so may be that’s their curse, but I mean honestly, these people are probably the most unlucky people. I mean first they were imprisoned by the Egyptians for thirty years, throughout all thirty years the Jews were working in the worst state living under an oppressive nation. They manage to exile out of Egypt and travelled to the Promised Land. Then when the you thought the worst was over, between 1930s to the end of World War II, the Jews were once again caught in the middle of the shits, more than 5,933,900 Jews was killed as part of the Final Solution. But wait! There’s more… After the 1948 till now, since declaring their independence, they weren’t the most welcomed people in the middle-east. It just Jews never seem to able to settle down and be left in peace. I’m here to promote Zionism or even being Antisemitism, but simply making the point that these people are just plain… unlucky.

Buddhism are peaceful enough. Buddhist unlike any other religion hasn’t started any wars, try to take back any holy land, hasn’t blown themselves up because of infidels, one monk (right) did burn himself alive… now that’s doing it like a man. But what really shits me is probably, the founder of Buddhism himself… that’s right, Buddha, why you may ask? the guy brought a collective philosophy that; everything in life is materialistic and in order to achieve enlightenment, one should give up all these materialistic objects to achieve enlightenment so they can reach Nirvana. That’s easy to say, especially if you’re the son of a king… Wait Buddha was the son of a king. I mean this guy was suppose to be the next king, his dad has great plans for him, but instead he chose to be a holy man. I mean how pissed off do you think his father the king would be? I mean its easy for him to give up everything that’s materialistic because his from a wealthy family. But can a common person at the time afford to do the same thing? Don’t think so Buddha.

I’ve decide to give Scientology a bash, for several reason. I walked by the Church of Scientology and was harassed to take a Dianetic test, they’re more pushy then bloody Mormons. I also wanted to see if I get sued for exposing Scientology secrets. I mean here it is, a religion and that’s if you can call it a ‘religion’, created by a science fiction writer. Anyway, the theory about Scientology is… actually no, I’m not going to explain it, not rich enough to afford a lawyer in case Scientologist decide to sue me… instead I’m going to post a link where it explains the story of Scientology which involves something Alien warlord named Xenu, I just saved you guys shitload of money!

Now after all the rant, you’re probably am I an Atheist? or even Agnostic? No… I believe in a Supreme Being, except may be my Supreme Being is different to yours. In fact may be you’re Supreme Being is the same as mine. What’s more I just want to point out is that religions are like Transformers, they are ‘more than meets the eye‘. Also what annoys me about religion is the purpose of it. Religion is suppose to be a guide, but as soon as you use it as an excuse for converting people and when they refuse to be converted you blow yourself up than that is wrong. Also no religion is perfect, may be because its written by the people, and people are full of imperfection and hypocrisy.

Also, science an religion never liked each other. There’s also been debate whether in school we should teach Creationism or Evolution. Whether we should teach Natural Selection or Intelligent Design. I mean look at the human body does it look like its from an Intelligent Design? I mean we have a Recreational Organ next to a Waste Processing unit, indeed it’s quite intelligent. Then we have cloning, I mean we have all these religious conservative theologians who tells us that we should not play god because we don’t have the power to do so. Well I say why not? I mean didn’t the Bible quote; Then God created man in his own image? I mean hell, if we continue quoting the Bible we also realise that God was the first genetic engineer; and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof//which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman. I mean dude, God did it… and if he makes us in his own image I guess we should also have his ability to do so as well.

I really should of went to Deans house and get trashed while playing Wii…

 

 

 

Oh Jesus… think I might have erection problems… may be even premature ejaculations

Those people who listens to radio will surely know what I’m talking about, for those who don’t know its about those AMI (Advanced Medical Institute) nasal sprays. Whats different with their nasal spray compare to normal nasal spray you get from chemist? Well this nasal sprays helps with “male” problems, for those who don’t know what a male problem is, well basically its:

• Erectile Dysfunction: Your penis can’t get hard when the situation calls for it.
• Premature Ejaculation: You can’t control your ejaculation.

Basically, the nasal spray is developed by a Dr Jacov Vaisman (below), who is also the CEO of AMI and also claims that it has already cured 250,000 men with the same problem. Regardless whether the product works or not is not important, I mean there are men on the internet who buys pills that promises will “increase” the size of their penis, again whether the product works or not is not important. What is annoying about it is the advertisement on the radio. The whole thing started really innocently where it was just a guy on the radio explaining the “problems” to the listeners and then like all products it gives the product name and a phone number to call. It was acceptable… THEN they started getting creative (and getting lame). Here are some example of their ads:

• This commercial lasts about 30 seconds, unfortunately so do some of us bloke.
• If premature ejaculation is putting an end to your special cuddles, or you’re having problems keeping it up longer, it might be worth sticking something up your nose.
• Nasal delivery technology can turn “ugh” (a woman sighs) into “Aaaahhhh” (A woman screams in ecstasy), so you’ll feel like one of the boys again. So call AMI for nasal delivery technology.

The first time you hear it, it’ll get you chuckled a bit… admittedly the ads are quite clever. Lame, very lame actually… but clever, but then it just annoys the crap out of you, especially to a man, if you’re a man and you heard that radio ad not once a day, but being literally bombarded by the same ads over and over again at least once when the ad break comes up… you subconsciously start questioning yourself:

• Do you have any erection problem?
• Are your performance up to the standard of your lover?
• Does 20 minutes consider OK for sex?

Whats worse when your out there having sex with your love one, that ad starts to play in your head, it really starts to get to you, those same questions start popping up in your head. Come to the think of it, may be thats how they get their clients. I mean their primary target is after all… man, and when you start to think you have a problem especially while you’re having sex then the ad has done their job. But honestly, those advertisements can really be a pain in the ass even to the point of pure fucking annoyance.

However, the lame messages of the advertisements are not the major issues here. Its the broadcasting time of the advertisement, I mean these advertisements are played early hours of the day to god knows when, and they play it everyday. I mean even the Jerry Springer show where its a media freak show has the courtesy of broadcasting the show at 12 pm in the afternoon so it avoids children and also stops ALL broadcast during school holidays. When I heard the AMI advertisement 7:30 am in the morning heading to work and 3:30 pm in the afternoon for a snack, it got me thinking, parents will be driving their children back and forth school and if the parents have the radio on, kids will be exposed words like; erection, premature ejaculation or “keeping it up”. I mean if a teenager hears it they might have a giggle or two, but if a primary school kid hears it, how are you going to explain what erections are? In no time your kids would be saying those very same words on the playground and when the teachers hears them saying it, the teachers would brand as an irresponsible parents in the next Parent Teacher Meeting, oh the joy!

Right now you might be saying; “But radio ads are different from TV shows like Jerry Springer, because Jerry Springer is a TV show. Kids are more open to mature content on TV then radio ads, where the messages may be mature but kids may not understand the meaning“.

This is true, kids these days are learn things (both good and bad) more faster from visual presentation such as; documentaries, movies and TV shows.However, a brothel in North Sydney named The Boardroom of North Shore ran advertisements on the radio as well, they too contains lame but smart gimmicks such as; Happy Ending. Their advertisement never contain mature words such as; sex. The only word that comes to anything close to sex is the sexual innuendo (In-your-endo *High Five The Todd (right) style!*) is the word: Happy Ending. The only difference where the The Boardroom of North Shore and the AMI have is the hours they ran the ad, the brothel ad ran in the late hours around 11 pm where for obvious reason so kids don’t have to listen to mature contents.

Now this rant isn’t about the lame gimmicks or the annoying subliminal messages. Well actually it is, except in today’s society where people’s email inbox are constantly being bombarded by spam mails about: Sexual fling sites, porn sites, girls masturbating on webcam, people having sex with animals, penis extension operations, penis extension pills and Viagra. Where TV advertisements after 10:30 pm are filled with phone sex hotlines we really don’t need another medium to be corrupted. Commercialism is free to advertise whatever product they want to advertise, however, certain products should only be advertise during certain hours of the day for really obvious reasons. I like sex… in fact I love sex, but I don’t need a product that is advertised so many times its been drilled into my subconscious mind where whenever I’m having sex that I question myself; how hard does the penis has to be, in order to be consider to be ‘hard‘ or is 35 minutes too short for my girlfriend before I reach orgasm, considered as premature ejaculation?

Honestly… I don’t need that…

 

NEWS.com.au – Shane Warne has found new love! Escaping from the evil clutches of Simone Callahan!

That indeed would be a funny title if it was found on newspapers. Those of you the keep up with your news update may have undoubtedly heard Shane Warne has so called “cheated” on his wife (Simone Callahan) again. Now, honestly I really don’t give a crap whether or not Shane Warne has cheated on his wife. News article these days has basically stoop to a new low, I mean when did news articles started to cover bitchy articles about whom cheated on whom? What’s worse the article was broadcast during the news as if its important and the nation should care about it. I mean how about giving us an update on how the war in Iraq is going? Or even give us an update on the search for Madeline hell they can even do an update on the search for the Chinese dude that killed his wife and stuffed her in the boot then took their daughter to Melbourne left her there and then flew to LA. News about how Shane Warne cheated (or found new love and has escape from the clutches of his wife) should be left in the womens magazine and stay there.

However, this blog is not about how depressing our news is these days. What really shits me is this article by Anita Quigley that was posted on news.com.au two days later. The title of the article was Why do married men stray? Something is wrong with the title to start of with… married men followed by stray. I mean come on now, when would society cease its beating on men? As a member of the male species I do admit that most of the time when we cheat is lust and after million years of evolution we men have yet to gain the skill to think think with our head-head when being seduced. However, in todays society when men do cheat the fact is we do it for the same reason as women;

• Lack of attention
• Lack of satisfaction
• The thrill and excitement

The fact that I know these reasons is not because I’ve cheated on my girlfriend but I have witness and know people who is seeing someone else behind their loved ones. I don’t support it but at the same time I don’t judge them as well because there are issues within their relationship that only they know about and it is not up to me to point fingers and criticise their actions.

I mean men aren’t the only people that cheat on their loved ones; the fact is women do it as well. Women aren’t exactly angels. We have to keep in mind women cheats as well, on 5th of January, 2000. The BBC published an article that 64% of women has cheated on their loved ones. Women in todays society enjoy very much the same freedom and privileges as men do, yet when a man finds new love with another woman he is branded as cheater, at the same time if a woman cheats on her loved one she is hailed as a hero, breaking away from the clutches of her evil boyfriend, fiance or husband. It seems whenever women cheats, their reason is always legitimate and acceptable, yet when men cheats their reason always render back to the point of lust.

Let use Shane Warnes incident as an example. How do we know that the reason why Shane Warne cheated on Simone Callahan was not Simones fault? May be Shane Warne was not getting enough attention from Simone, may be he doesn’t feel love by Simone or may be he just simply not satisfy by Simone. So far the only criticism for Simone Callahan is the fact that she was dumb enough for giving him another chance. Yet we don’t know that, we don’t know if it is Simone’s fault, or is Shane Warne just being an ass and was dumb enough to send text message intended for another woman to his missus phone.

On the point of political incorrectness, lets not forget the Violence Against Women – Australia says No campaign where the government spends millions of dollars showing advertisements of (female) victims and (male) offenders of; rape, domestic violence and assault and then like all good campaign they sent out booklets to individual homes for more information. My questions is then does that mean Violence Against Men – Australia says Yes? The fact is the same shit also happens to men as well, men are victims as well. I do have to admit though, it would be funny if they start broadcasting advertisements where men are saying things like “Well she showed me her tits and force me to perform cunnilingus on her, when I refused I was threatened to be terminated because of insubordination“. The fact is violence against anyone or anything Australia says NO.

The point I’m trying to make is the fact that there are groups and organisations that has spent decades fighting for equal rights for women in society and ironically the same left wing womens group turn around and are being biased in support of women who is committing the very same crimes no different if it was committed by a man. Equality is important and I’m a firm supporter of it, but is this really equality and justice? May be we should really sit down and re-evaluate our position and define equality and justice.

What’s even more sad is the fact that news are more like commercial commodities these days. Rather than reporting the truth and relevant news that effects society, they are more concerned about headlines, surely if my title was used as the headline no one would even bother to read it or give a shit about it. It is no wonder teenagers and young adults are more concerned about who is sleeping with who, who is breaking up with who, using people such as Paris Hilton, Britney Spears or Lindsay Lohan as role models but thats another rant for another time.

In the end I would like to offer you a final word… This government is against same sex marriages, but any man can tell you that after getting married; the sex is always the same.

 

Smoking – Where has our Democracy gone?

Those who know me basically heard me touching this topic before. Don’t be thrown off by the title, not supporting smoking here or saying smoking is good for you, all I’m trying to point out here is the fact that smoking may be an ugly habit, it represents solely the very fundamental of our liberty and democracy.

I mean honestly, throughout our life time there are people that tells you what to do and what to think through different mediums. Although we should listen to these people, it is also important to keep in mind that we should challenge the authority of these people, questioning who are they to tell us what to do and what to think. Lets put it in a very fundamental term; as a child when you parents tell you that chocolate is bad for your teeth did it stop you from eating chocolate? While I’m not suggesting that smoking is good for you, I am trying to suggest that rather than acting like sheeps we should go and see for ourselves what is good for us.

Personally, all these ads about quitting smoking and the warning labels (with pictures) on cigarette cartons are waste of money. We don’t need a cigarette carton to tell us that smoking can kill us. We know that already… we all know that cigarette causes: heart disease, lung cancer, emphysema etc. The point remains that it is still the form of lifestyle that smokers chooses. On the point of warning label; now that it is proven that the number one killer of todays society is cholesterol and heart attack, why isn’t there warning labels on packets of potato chips or fatty cheese?

While some argue that the pictures on the boxes are not aimed at adults but at kids and teenagers, we have to keep this in mind. Its called education, it comes from our teachers and our parents, it is their responsibility to warn their children’s the danger of the world including cigarettes, so when the time comes they can make the decision for themselves. If your need a cigarette box to teach your kids the dangers of smoking then again you have failed as parent this also leads to the next point; Responsibility. It is one of the biggest lesson that many family failed to teach their children these days, they failed to teach that they are responsible for their own action and then until then they wish to choose smoking then it is their freedom.

What I’m trying to point out here is the fact that the government is alway putting the words; freedom and liberty on their lips and at the same time there are fascist groups trying to tell you what to do and what to think. I’m surprised on one hand these group of people is screaming out ban on smoking and at the same time they are supporting homosexuality. I’m not a homophobe but smokers like them, chose a certain specific habit of lifestyle. But don’t get me wrong, I’m not supporting smoking. I’m supporting Liberalism and Democracy, and this doesn’t just restrict to smoking.

I’m really trying to point out that we’re living in a democratic society, while people can tell us and inform us what to think and what to do, ultimately it is us who should be making the decisions as we are individuals of society.

 

More angry Asian rant…

On a lighter side of things this awesome movie Bratz is out. What shits me about this movie is not the fact that its another movie made because of another fanchise, this movie shits me because of the Asian character… She’s Good at Science and Maths, I mean come on, years of stereotype even I’m sick of it. I’m surprised she’s not good at Kung Fu. I mean in high school, white boys would sit around me in a maths test so they can copy my answers while I copy my answers off an Arab named John. As an Asian myself I witness many things that made me go “Bloody Asians”, it all has to do with history really.

The Chinese invented four things that changed the world:

• Printing
• Paper
• Compass
• Gun Powder

The last thing that they invented really hurt the Chinese, they invented gun powder, then the white folks would get their hands on it and then they use the same gun powder to conquer and dominate the Chinese, it really is shameful when you think about it. May be thats how the Chinese lost all its dignity while the Japs and Koreans always put its dignity as the most important thing in life. This blog however have for no relations at all to the other ones I’ve been rambling about, though it does leads to an incident I remember with my Grandparents.

My grandparents, as much as I love them, they’re hardcore Communist, they truly believed that Communism and the Chinese has a symbolic relations, and whats the relations? Well the colour of Communism is… RED, the blood colour of the Chinese, well… RED so therefore, there’s a relations. Well for them anyway…

I mean honestly, what kind of reason is that, but I was 12 at that time and you just don’t question your grandparents when you’re 12, its just wrong. But I remember the last time I went back, the Americans were bombing Iraq and my grandparents were in front of the TV and they were cussing… “Bloody Americans, always bombing the poor countries, I hope they all and rot in Hell” This is a normal comment for a die hard Communist. After the news segmented ended an advertisement came up it was for a cold medicine and I remember the phrase of the advertisement “Made and Proven in USA… Best cold medicine in USA”, as soon as the ad finished they turned to me and ordered me to buy the medicine for them when I return to Australia. You see this scene really confuses me, just less then a minute ago they were cursing at the Evil Capitalist Aggressor of America and then they saw an ad for a product that is made by the very same Evil Empire and they want the product! Naturally I questioned why, why they want the product when its produce by the very same evil empire.

Their reason was simple… It’s made in America, this got me more confused. I basically told them what I just witnessed, less then a minute ago they would wish that the “Evil Aggressors” would failed and collapsed and then in no less then two minutes later you’re telling me that you want to buy a product made and manufacture by the same “Aggressors”, wouldn’t be the most effective way to destroy a nation simply just stop purchasing it nations products so you’re crippling it economy? They just looked at me o.O and just said in very quiet words Just get the medicine OK?

Bloody Asians…

 

Why our Government is awesome

Rather than actually talking how I’m abusing poor customers at the retail stores again I decide to do something different, no I’m not going to compliment anyone, except Stephen Colbert, that guy is just awesome. Yes Nolan, you’ve convinced me in to liking that guy.

Undoubtedly most people have watched, seen or heard how the government is rolling out sites and software to protect kids from ‘predators’… Shit actually cost $84 million! This shows the lack of understanding about the interweb from our government, they truly believed and whats more importantly believed that a software can replace good parenting, really, lets get realistic, if you found porn on your kids computer, you should be relieved, at least you know they’re normal. Then and I mean then, you should explain to them what they have just witness is a something evil. I mean it could be worse, you could’ve found Bestiality porn on your kids computer, then it will be a time to seat down and reflect on what failed parents you’ve been.

What surprised me this time is for the first time this government has modelled itself off China, guess APEC really made an impact =P. However, this government truly believes that by Censoring materials they are being effective in protecting its citizens from harmful materials that will corrupt and doom their souls to eternal damnation. With the increased flow of the data and information from the internet I’m wondering when would this government learn that censorship no longer works? I think what annoy me the most about the whole issue is the fact that the government wasted $84 million on the project, when they can use the same amount of money to be spent on our Medicare, we have a Medicare system these days that basically says; “We’ll give you with Viagra but we’re won’t pay for your glasses, so basically you get a hard on but you can’t find the hole” or even essential stuff like our Education system where 40% of Uni graduates believed that Joan of Arc is Noah’s wife.

However, it could’ve been worse, we could be run by the LABOR government right now, it is them after all who introduced HECS and been having the highest increased of interest rates. Remember kids, in Australia the LABOR party has no U! Yes William they do ho design awesome T-Shirts. But remember this the next time you vote: Prime Ministers are like diapers, it should be changed often… for the same reason.

However, saying that I’m still voting for the Liberals. Voluntary Student Unionism or VSU is probably the best thing ever introduced by this government in its years of reign. Kudos to the Liberals!

 

Asians are fun to screw with

This shit happened a week ago, and you know me, Asian issues really gets on my nerves. Althea knows the story told her the first day it happened, and thats how much it got to me.

Where I work is a freakin “tourist-go” location, on a daily basis we get an army of Chinese or Koreans rushing the poor little Newington Woolies, the point is, on one of this visits, a poor Chinese tourist came in to the shop and wanted to buy a bottle of wine. This is the gold part, being a tourist, he came up to me and go “I want to buy this” not in English though, not even Engrish, he didn’t even attempt to speak English. The guy basically spoke Chinese in an English accent, yes he said; ‘I want to buy this’ in Chinese but with an English accent. I don’t know how his brain chemistry worked at that time, but it certainly allowed him to feel that by speaking in his own language BUT with an English accent, it will allow him to speak English, thus, breaking down the language barrier. It was phenomenal…

After he said what he said, it just really made me clicked, its Saturday, its busy, I have so much shit to do, and I have an asshole in my shop, at the same time its also an insult to me as well. Don’t get me wrong, if this guy came to me and tell me he wants to buy the wine in Chinese I won’t be so agro, its the fact that he decides to add an English accent in his sentence that really annoyed me.

Again, being me I decide to fuck this guy up… Hardcore, like Debbie. Some of you know me, I can speak both Cantonese and Mandarin, but I’m gonna fuck this guy up. I told him; I don’t understand Chinese. He realise at this point we’re having a problem, not because I’m causing one, but because we still have the language barrier. To my suprise he tries the shit again. This time, he decides to do it… “slowly”, I can’t believe it, he actually believed his method is working except, may be his speed was a little to fast. I just shook my head and go ‘I have no idea what you’re saying mate’.

He then proceeds to walk to the counter and indicates he wants to buy the shit. By the way, the guys around 25, so its obvious his legal, but I love liquor laws… I want to see his ID, I pointed out to the sign that contains different pictures of ID cards and to my surprise I don’t have to have to use sign language to repeat myself, he tells me doesn’t have except this time he didn’t try to pull the same stunt again, probably come to the conclusion that his method is futile, he walks out. For a moment, I felt I have triumphant… I’ve won, I felt superior, much like overtaking someone on the stairs. I continue d working with a smile on my face until…

The fucker returns to the shop, this time he brought back up, except this guy seem to know the language, his tour guide introduced himself and showed me the passport of his customer indicating he his legal. Deep inside I was laughing hard by now. I let them purchase the shit, just before they left I said “Thank you and please do come again” in flawless mandarin. They both thanked me except the realised one thing. For the last 45 minutes I’ve been telling them I don’t know mandarin, this is where they get pissed, they were screaming in Chinese by now, telling me off for wasting their time and demanded to see my manager.

Honestly, the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he never existed, I told them I didn’t say anything at all, what’s great, I kept on telling them I’m Korean. They didn’t believed me, they were pissed. Thank God at the same time Luke the fellow work mate walked in, we worked together for like 2 years now and he pretty much witness me pulling shit like this, so I just told the two customers, if you don’t believe me you can ask the white guy, the guys white so you can trust him because his white. The tour guide asked Luke what natio I am, Luke naturally answered: He is Korean.

It was gold… they’re face was just unforgettable…

Its like killing someone, stuffing her body in the boot of the car, then take their child to the another countries train station where its monitored by hundreds of CCTV and then leaving their child there, fly to another country. Then after days searching for the body they realised one thing… OMFG the body was in front of us at all time. Just imagine that face, the look just brings a smile to your heart

In the end those two guys have no choice but to leave, its great, I love Asians. I mean just recently after realising I’ll be quiting soon, I finally have the guts to do something to some FoB Asians who have no idea what we’re saying when we greet them except to smile and nod.

I shit you not. You go up to them “How are you today” all day to is Smile… and nod. You then ask them “is that all?” Again Smile .. and nod. So I have this little thing I when I work and there’s no one else in the shop except me and the fobby customer.

After working for 2 years and seeing more fobby customers then a custom illegal immigrant detention center you can pick a fob from the crowd like zombie looking for breathing souls in a graveyard.

So customer, comes up to you… simply go (SMILE you have to smile or they know you fucking them up, but if you smile they think you’re being friendly); “God, You’re such a cunt aren’t you?”… its great because they have only one reaction… smile and then nod, they think you’re being friendly to them, basically you can vent out all you’re anger at them! But beware, avoid words like Fuck, Shit and Stupid, this people aren’t dumb, they know when you’re harassing them, I usually give them my personally favorite… “I HAVE PERFORMED INTERCOURSE WITH YOUR SPOUSE OR SIGNIFICANT OTHER”… its great… because they just smile and nod…

its win win!

 

Woolies Japanese White Hate

This came to me the other day at work and I express the following opinion with another customer and fellow worker of mine. No matter how hard we try to avoid using the plastic bags, the number of whales will still continue to drop, why you may ask, simple; Japanese. I mean if the plastic bag doesn’t kill those god damn over sized Jurassic mammals, another form of lower intelligence being will, and thats the Japanese. But wait, the Japanese aren’t killing them for food or resource, they are killing whales for Scientific researches, well this is where Chasers come in handy. May be indeed we should kill some Japanese for Scientific research as well, may be and I mean may be then we will find a very distinct “Scientific” reason why the Japanese are causing the whales to the point of extinction.

But am I spreading the hate of the Japanese here? No, I’m not, the argument leads on. Keep this in mind, during the time I made this speech to the customer, the store was full of Crackers. Yes that’s right. I just referred you Caucasian as: Crackers officially on this blog site!

Anyway, the customer then proceed to tell me; “Well right now, its not the Whales that is in trouble. Its the POLAR BEAR”, I replied to her comment by saying this “Who cares about the Polar Bears!? They’re WHITE!”

This is the gold part, in a store full of crackers in a cracker nation, the last thing you want to do is spread White Hate and “Non-White Power”, but being me and I’m an asshole I did it, I said out loud with the intention of just randomly any of the customers march up to the service desk and tell them that one of the employees is being racist, to my disappointment. None of them did.